5 minute Friday: on mercy.

September 13, 2013, Michaela Evanow, 11 Comments

It’s that time again. Write for 5 minutes flat, prompted by one word, chosen by another. Here we go…

MERCY.

When I think of what I wanted to do and where I wanted to go as a teenager and young woman, I think of the rough places, that no one wanted to go to, the places where mercy was all you needed. So, we went to the dying in the Mother Teresa homes across the developing world, the smells and sights, too much for my heart to bear. The old and frail, the long fingernails and the bedpans troubled me, challenged me, and I didn’t like it. These crumbling crevices that housed the dying in this bustling, chaotic Egyptian capital were too much. Alright, I can’t do it, I can’t do mercy like this. This is what these beautiful nuns are for, oh bless their blue trimmed robes. They are like Jesus.

So, let’s try babies, let’s try catching slippery babies, born onto metal beds in the windowless room of a government maternity hospital in India.

And this, this is what I can do. This is what caused me to sweat and smile and cry and be broken, and no amount of blood or crowning babies could sway me. I was in love.

india

This is mercy in action, I thought, I could put my stamp on it, call it my own. The vernix, the lanugo, and yes even the death. Although this kind of death–in these numbers, caved my heart right in and made me cry “mercy Abba, mercy“.

Oh, how the world reeks with suffering.

And yet, the world is full of mercy, it is fragranced with this sweet anointing oil.

Micah 6:8

But we are the ones carrying this mercy, carrying it in our cups, until we are full, full and overflowing. We are the ones changing bedpans and comforting the grieving mother. We are the ones bringing meals and sending gifts that say: love and hope and mercy! We are the charging army that carries these burdens. We have a grace, even when we may be heavy laden, that calls us to carry other’s burdens, throw them at the foot of the cross. This is too heavy for you, here, let me.

I carry your heart, I carry it in my heart, says e.e cummings.

And now, the need for mercy has come right to my home, to my womb and to the child we have created. She is reliant on us for everything, she is fragile, and she still brings me to the Father’s feet, crying, “mercy Abba, mercy.” And this time I can’t run away, and I can’t say: this is impossible.

Sometimes suffering knocks on our front door, but we know, oh we know through the darkness, that mercy is here, mercy is coming.

And it looks like you. And it looks like Jesus.
And it looks like love, so let your heart love and let your needs be put aside, and carry the cup of mercy, carry it full, so it brims and pours out.

Let it overflow.

ee cummings i carry your heart

11 Comments

  • Reply Joy September 16, 2013 at 1:36 PM

    What a beautiful picture of service!

  • Reply Maripat Rawson September 14, 2013 at 9:44 PM

    Michaela, I thought you’d like to know that I’ve registered at a local college to learn the mechanics of Word Press – your scribings have been very encouraging to me. At 71 I’ll certainly be obvious in my class at school but my heart is filled with eagerness to continue my ‘Life-Education.’ So, dear one, thank you. Smooches – blessings – mega kudo’s.

    • Reply Michaela. September 15, 2013 at 12:13 PM

      Good for you! That is so amazing! Can’t wait to see the results 🙂

  • Reply Barbie September 13, 2013 at 1:55 PM

    What a beautiful heart you have and the way you describe mercy just pulls me in. I say Yes! “so let your heart love and let your needs be put aside, and carry the cup of mercy, carry it full, so it brims and pours out.” Yes! Stopped by from the FMF! Have a beautiful weekend!

    • Reply Michaela. September 13, 2013 at 4:09 PM

      Aw thanks Barbie! Love to hear from you and thanks for stopping by!

  • Reply Nanny September 13, 2013 at 10:00 AM

    let mercy reign upon us all and let our heart carry you when yours is not strong enough my dear

    • Reply Michaela. September 13, 2013 at 12:40 PM

      Thank you, I know that you do…

  • Reply Marilee Congo September 13, 2013 at 9:52 AM

    Oh Michaela, the tears are flowing down my face as I type. Thank you. What a special young woman you are, with a deep and beautiful heart. You express yourself so powerfully and yet so tenderly. Oh that mercy would flow from my inner being today…

    • Reply Michaela. September 13, 2013 at 12:39 PM

      Thank you for commenting. You share so well too, it is just as open and raw.
      xo

  • Reply Samantha September 13, 2013 at 9:35 AM

    Your posts are, without fail, beautiful. Every time.

    • Reply Michaela. September 13, 2013 at 12:40 PM

      Wow this is so kind. Thanks Samantha.

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